One Song Glory
by bbopalunaa
Summary: How is one supposed to cope when their diagnosis is deemed 'incurable? Oneshot AU KuroFai


I wrote this for the Summer History Challenge on the KuroFai LJ community. I didn't win, not that I really expected to, seeing as how all the other entries were absolutely amazing, but this is my go. Posted today for my 4 year anniversary on This is set in 1982 New York during the AIDS epidemic and inspired by the play-slash-movie RENT, if you couldn't tell by the title. The song used is Being With You by Smokey Robinson.

**One Song Glory**

"It's so pretty this time of year," Fai mumbled as he and Kurogane walked through Central Park, hand in hand. "I love the fall. It's a shame there's no trees like this anywhere else in the city."

Kurogane watched as his lover's eyes sparkled at the sight of the falling leaves. "That's what happens when you try to pack so many damn people into one place."

"I suppose you're right," the blond sighed and leaned in closer to the larger man. Kurogane wordlessly let go of the other's hand and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, causing Fai to smile. "I think I'd much rather live in the country. I've never really liked the city."

"If you don't like it here, then why haven't you left? You'd think, being the stubborn bastard you are, you'd be gone the second you got the chance."

"You _would_ think so, huh?" Fai sighed. "Well, I could never leave when my Kuro-pon is still here!"

"I'm being serious," Kurogane grunted, leading them off the path and into a small, grassy clearing. Another sigh.

"I guess I just never got the chance. I don't have the money and I could never quit my job." Fai was a waiter-slash-singer in a local lounge. The money wasn't great, but it was enough to get by. Plus, he rather enjoyed it. He loved to sing, and it was that much more rewarding on the nights when he found Kurogane at one of the small tables in the back.

The raven haired man settled down under a large tree and signaled for Fai to do the same. The blond cuddled into his lover's lap and wrapped his long arms around Kurogane's neck.

"How about this…" Kurogane started, petting Fai's hair. "Someday, we'll get out of here. We can move to the country or wherever the hell you want. Alright?"

"Kuro-rin?" Fai whispered, a small smile on his face.

"Hm?"

"Thank you," he mumbled, burying his face in his lover's shirt. They sat there together for a few moments, listening to the birds chirping and other people bustling by. Soon, Kurogane stood, mumbling something about it getting late, as he pulled the smaller man with him.

"How about we go and get something to eat before we head home?" the red eyed man asked as they made their way back to the path.

"I'm not really that hungry, Kuro-chu…" he responded, once again cuddling up to the other man's side.

"You have to eat something. You've been loosing weight like crazy." He wrapped an arm around Fai's waist and squeezed to illustrate his point. "It's not healthy."

"I'm fine, Kuro-puu. Really. Don't worry so much about me."

"I have to, because you don't," Kurogane quickly countered, as he stopped and pulled the blond to the side, looking him in the eyes. He reached up and cupped Fai's cheek, stroking the smooth skin with his thumb. "You've been getting paler, too." Fai looked away, breaking Kurogane's gaze.

"It's nothing. So _please_, Kuro-koi, just leave it." Fai moved from the larger man's grasp and started back in their original direction. Kurogane quickly followed with a sigh.

"Fine, but you're getting something to eat." When the blue eyed man opened his mouth to protest, his lover cut him off. "And I don't care if you're not hungry. You need to eat something." Fai sighed in defeat as he weakly followed behind Kurogane.

They walked a while in silence, headed toward a small restaurant not ten minutes from Central Park. Kurogane kept glancing back at the blond who was, for some reason, not keeping his pace. He had slowed quite a few times, only to have Fai do the same, keeping his distance. It wasn't long before Fai stopped all together.

"Kuro-tan…" he groaned, getting the other man's attention. "I feel dizzy." Kurogane quickly pushed past the people lining the sidewalk to where Fai stood.

"Shit. Do you need to sit down or something?" Before Fai could respond, he collapsed, his head hitting the pavement with a sickening 'crack'.

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Blue eyes fluttered open, and Fai found himself in a small white room. He tried to raise his head to look around the unfamiliar place, but a sharp pain shot up his spine in response.

"Damnit," he mumbled, reaching up to his head and feeling the dressings that encased it. He decided against movement for the time being.

"You idiot," Fai heard a voice from the side of his bed. "'Don't worry about it' my ass." It was definitely Kurogane.

"Kuro-chi, I'm-"

"No," Kurogane growled, silencing the smaller man. "You knew there was something wrong, so why the hell didn't you say something?" He stood at the blond's bedside.

"I-I didn't want you to worry about me…" Fai whimpered softly.

"Not telling me only made me worry more, damnit!" Kurogane sat back down, trying to calm himself. After a few moments, he spoke again, in a much more composed tone. "They don't know what's wrong. I thought it was because you haven't been eating, but the doctors don't think that was what made you pass out. They want to keep you overnight to run some tests."

"Kuro-min…" Fai whimpered softly. Kurogane could see the fear in the man's eyes. He could tell by that look that his lover didn't want to be left alone in that place.

"I'll stay the night. I don't give a shit about what the doctors say, so don't worry. I won't leave you alone." A tan hand laced with a pale one and gave it a small, reassuring squeeze.

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Morning came, and, much to the doctors' and nurses' dismay, Kurogane had yet to leave Fai's side. It took quite a bit of arguing and a few threats that Kurogane figured he would regret later, but it had all been worth it.

At about eight o'clock that morning, Fai was carted off to god knows where for his tests, leaving Kurogane alone to imagine the worst. He wasn't really the type to do that kind of thing, but being in that hospital had had a negative effect on his mind.

Did Fai know what was wrong all along? And if he did, why hadn't he told him? What if this was something serious? Something that might…

These thoughts floated around in his mind for almost three hours while he waited for Fai to return. Time had dragged on and on, but he was eventually broken from his thoughts when Fai entered the room in a wheelchair pushed by a young nurse. Kurogane stood to meet him as the blond smiled softly.

"So what's going on?" Kurogane asked, helping Fai as he somewhat shakily stood from his wheelchair.

"We can go home now, Kuro-pipi. Isn't that great?" Fai replied cheerily, a large grin now plastered on his face.

"Right," the nurse confirmed. "Now, why don't you go and get changed, Mr. Flourite. You clothes are in the bathroom." The woman smiled sweetly, and Fai did as he was told. When he was out of the room, the nurse lowered her voice so only Kurogane could hear. "We should have Mr. Flourite's test results within a few days. We'll send a copy to your residence, and if it's anything serious, we'll schedule another appointment for him. Is that alright?" Kurogane just nodded. "Good. Mr. Flourite is free to leave whenever he is ready. Have a nice day." She shot him one more bright smile and instantly exited the room.

Kurogane looked over toward the open bathroom door, and quickly made his way toward it. When he entered, he found Fai brushing his hair in the mirror, softly singing to himself.

"_I don't care if they start to avoid me. I don't care what they do. I don't care about anything else but being with you, being with you._"

"It's our song," Kurogane gave a little grin as he wrapped his arms around his lover from behind. Fai nodded, smiling to himself as he put the brush down on the counter.

"Do you remember _why_ it's our song?" the lithe man giggled, covering Kurogane's hands with his own and leaning back into his embrace.

"How could I not? You'd kill me if I ever forgot." The red eyed man leaned forward and kissed his lover's temple. "That's what you were singing the night we first saw each other." And that was true. One night, Kurogane was dragged by his younger sister Tomoyo to a small lounge, much to his dismay at the time. Once there, he found himself enthralled by the young man singing that night. After some encouragement from Tomoyo, Kurogane had approached the blond man, who had introduced himself as Fai, and they had been together ever since.

"Good job, Kuro-myu! You get a cookie!" Fai laughed, turning around to face the taller man. Reaching up, he pulled Kurogane close and kissed him softly. When they separated, Fai spoke again. "Let's go home, Kuro-sama. I hate being in this place…"

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It had been three days since Fai's visit to the hospital, and if he was worried about his test results, he did his best not to show it. He seemed to be his usual bubbly self, but Kurogane could see flashes of doubt in his eyes when Fai thought no one was watching.

It was on that third day that Fai had come inside from retrieving the mail, a nervous look in his eyes that he didn't bother to try to hide. Kurogane watched as he threw the mail down onto the kitchen counter, keeping one envelope with him. Before the raven haired man could question his lover, Fai took the envelope into their shared bedroom and closed the door behind him.

A few minutes passed, and Kurogane contemplated following the blond, but before he had decided, Fai reentered the living room.

"You alright?" Kurogane asked, sitting down on the couch. He watched as Fai sat across the room in a plush armchair.

"I got my test results back." A sad smile formed on the blond's lips. "It says I'm HIV positive. I've never heard of it before, so I have no idea what it means, but it doesn't sound good…" Fai sighed. "I guess I'll have to go back and do a follow-up." Kurogane stood and crossed the room. He sat down on the arm of the chair and wrapped his arms around his lover.

"It'll be alright." He kissed the mop of blond hair below him. "You call the hospital tonight before work and I'll take you in the morning. Then we can get this all settled. Sound good?"

"Mhmm," Fai mumbled, struggling to keep his small smile from disappearing.

"You don't have to smile," Kurogane said softly. "I know you don't want to, so you don't have to try so damn hard."

"Thank you, Kuro-sama, but I'm okay." He pulled himself from the larger man's grip. "I'm going to call the hospital now." Only after kissing Kurogane on the forehead did he leave the room.

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It was another excruciating wait for Kurogane the next day as he sat in the waiting room in the hospital. It was, thankfully, shorter than the time before, but the wait this time seemed harder.

When Fai entered the room, his eyes were red, as if he had been crying, but he still wore his usual smile. Kurogane stood when the smaller man approached him, offering him a small, reassuring grin.

"What did they say?"

"I don't really want to talk about it here." Kurogane could hear his lover's voice shaking slightly. "Can we go home?"

The walk home was quiet and rather awkward. The red eyed man could tell that Fai was upset, but could think of nothing to say that wouldn't trouble him further, so he settled with letting the blond clutch tightly at his hand the whole way back.

When they returned to their apartment, Kurogane sat down on the couch, pulling Fai with him. The blue eyed man cuddled close to the man's side and sighed.

"So, are you going to tell me what happened?" the larger man questioned after a short silence.

"What I have…they've only known about it for about a year. They don't know much about it, but as of now, there isn't a cure. They said…" He took a deep, trembling breath. "They said I'm going to die, Kurogane. I have a year and a half at the very most." Tears began to side down his pale cheeks.

"Oh, god, Fai…" The larger man held the shuddering form closer, petting his hair softly. "Do they know what caused it?" Kurogane wiped the tears from his lover's face.

"Do you remember," Fai started, trying to control his emotions. "I told you about my brother?" Kurogane nodded. "Well, there's something that I never told you about the two of us. When we were back in high school, we had started using together. I had always thought that Yuui had died from overdosing, but…" He paused for a moment, once again fighting the tears. "Looking back now, he had a lot of the symptoms of this HIV, and the doctors told me that it could be passed through needles."

Kurogane was infuriated by learning this; that he had not been informed of it sooner, but chose not say anything. Fai had enough to worry about at the moment.

"They also said that it can be passed through unprotected sex, so please, you need to go and get tested." Kurogane nodded sadly. "But…" Fai continued, voice still trembling immensely. "I don't know what I'd do if I had gotten you sick."

"Don't say that," Kurogane growled. "Even if I was infected, it's not your fault. I wouldn't blame you in the slightest."

"But still…" Fai tried to protest, but gave up when he saw the look in those piercing red eyes. "You know, if this had happened four years ago, I wouldn't have minded. That's why Yuui and I started using. We didn't care if we lived or died. After I lost him, I was damn near suicidal." Fai felt tanned arms pull him in closer. "But then I met you, Kuro-rin. You gave me a reason to live."

"That's bullshit and you know it," Kurogane grumbled. "You did and still have plenty to live for."

"But you didn't know me before. You didn't live through…" Fai dropped his gaze, so that long strands of blond obscured his face. "…what we lived through."

"Well none of that matters now," Kurogane snapped, bringing Fai's eyes back to meet his own. "That was all in the past and there's not a damn thing that you can do to fix it, so deal with what going on _now_, because _that_ you can change."

"There's no cure for this, Kuro-puu. I already told you that," Fai rested his head on Kurogane's shoulder.

"We're going to fight this thing, so don't you worry about a damn thing." Kurogane ran his fingers gently through his lover's blond locks, holding him tightly.

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As months continued on, Fai's condition continued to deteriorate. There was still no hope for a cure. A year passed. He was much thinner than before, paler, and dark bags had formed permanently under his eyes. A good night's sleep was a rare luxury; night terrors constantly plagued his dreams. He had gotten along almost normally, though, until June, two months longer than expected. On one humid evening, Fai had collapsed in the middle of his and Kurogane's bedroom.

Kurogane had brought him to the hospital as fast as his feet could take him through the crowded streets. Once there, Fai was placed in a room, and had woken up two hours later.

"Kuro…gane?" Fai muttered when he had regained consciousness. "What happened?"

"You collapsed. We're at the hospital now." Kurogane felt as Fai's hand found his own. After an awkward silence, the blond spoke up.

"I'm going to die, aren't I?" he asked softly, no emotion audible in his voice.

"Don't say that," Kurogane squeezed the pale hand in his, careful not to disturb the IV connected to it.

"I've already lasted longer than they had thought. It's going to happen eventually." Fai offered him a weak smile.

"Don't do that. I've told you before; don't smile if you don't feel like it."

"I guess you're right," Fai bit his lip and started trembling slightly. "Tell me you love me?" Kurogane leaned forward, pulling his lover into a gentle embrace.

"I love you so much, now and forever."

Late that night, a heart monitor flat lined and Fai D. Flourite's life slipped away. His lover, Kurogane, cried for the first time since he had lost his mother as a child. The blond man was buried in a small graveyard out in the country After all, He had always wanted to live there.


End file.
